For some unfathomable reason I recently got into a lengthy (and only marginally completely bloody pointless) e-mail conversation with my friend, Deborah, on the subject of Club biscuits. Don't ask me why, please, it's genuinely not worth knowing! Now, I really like a nice Jacob's Club®™. Deb was wondering if they still existed having not seen them in the shops that she frequents for a while and I was happy to tell her that, indeed, they do. I get a seven-pack at my local Morrison's every now and then for the singular purpose of keeping them in business. Jacob's still make the - classic - orange filled ones (in an orange wrapper, of course, see above) the version that, I think, most people reading this will be familiar with. 
And also, I believe, they do a fruit and nut variant (in purple) and a sort-of minty variety (in a greenish wrapper). Never been keen on either of those, personally. Not liking either fruit or mint, it's reasonable that I wouldn't.
The ones that I used to hugely enjoy scoffing as a kid were the milk chocolate brand (in red) and, particularly, the dark chocolate version (also in green but with a comforting golf-ball on the wrapper) but Jacob's seemed to stop making those sometime around 1982.
Tragedy. If anybody from Jacob's happens to be reading this and is in some sort of position of authority, why'd you stop making them? They were very nice and I liked them! For some reason I always associate them with family holidays at Butlin's in the 1970s - probably because I ate lots there. Jacob's also, for while I believe, made a "chunky milk chocolate" version (in blue) but I haven't seen one of those for ages either. I seem to recall there was also a wafer version at one point (can't remember what colour the wrapper for that one was). 
And, apparently, during a web-search I discovered that they had a brief flirtation with a lemon and lime variant in the 1980s (in light green, and pictured). Never experienced those, myself, but I am assured they did, indeed, exist.
I still have, in my record collection, Called to the Bar a 1980 compilation vinyl LP of some great 1960s and 70s tunes - on CBS Records whom Jacob's had obviously done a deal with; I think that was probably because at that time they were using The Beach Boys' 'Barbara Ann' on a Club TV advert (slogan: "If you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit, join our Club"). The idea was that you collected about twelve Club biscuit wrappers (any sort would do) and sent them in with, like, fifty pence or something to cover postage and you got the LP in return. Bargain. The TV advert that it tied in with featured a stereotypical Teddy Boy in the dock of a court singing 'Bar-bar-bah, bar-bar-bah-club' and all the jury doing the harmonies after the usher had shouted 'Prisoner at the bar...' A - reasonably flattering - bit of artwork of the actor involved is featured on the LP's cover holding a Club orange-backer whilst the - I'm presuming prosecuting - barrister has one of the previously mentioned dark chocolate variants in his grubby mitt.
On the back cover, the judge is looking faintly groovy in a Batman-style in his wig, clicking his fingers to the sensational soaraway summery sounds thereupon. But, he has no obvious Club biscuit to hand. More fool he, I say. 
Fine bunch of songs on the LP, as you'll note. Why don't biscuit companies do stuff like that these days to promote their nice biccies? I think that LP might well've been the first place I ever even HEARD The Honeycombs' epic 'Have I The Right?' It was certainly the first time that I'd owned songs like 'Waterloo Sunset', 'Albatross', 'An Everlasting Love' and 'Something in the Air' on a record. In fact, apart from the thoroughly crap Dr Hook dirge on side two I reckon I still have just about everything on that LP somewhere in my CD collection. Yes, even Tina Charles.
And also, I believe, they do a fruit and nut variant (in purple) and a sort-of minty variety (in a greenish wrapper). Never been keen on either of those, personally. Not liking either fruit or mint, it's reasonable that I wouldn't.The ones that I used to hugely enjoy scoffing as a kid were the milk chocolate brand (in red) and, particularly, the dark chocolate version (also in green but with a comforting golf-ball on the wrapper) but Jacob's seemed to stop making those sometime around 1982.
Tragedy. If anybody from Jacob's happens to be reading this and is in some sort of position of authority, why'd you stop making them? They were very nice and I liked them! For some reason I always associate them with family holidays at Butlin's in the 1970s - probably because I ate lots there. Jacob's also, for while I believe, made a "chunky milk chocolate" version (in blue) but I haven't seen one of those for ages either. I seem to recall there was also a wafer version at one point (can't remember what colour the wrapper for that one was). 
And, apparently, during a web-search I discovered that they had a brief flirtation with a lemon and lime variant in the 1980s (in light green, and pictured). Never experienced those, myself, but I am assured they did, indeed, exist.I still have, in my record collection, Called to the Bar a 1980 compilation vinyl LP of some great 1960s and 70s tunes - on CBS Records whom Jacob's had obviously done a deal with; I think that was probably because at that time they were using The Beach Boys' 'Barbara Ann' on a Club TV advert (slogan: "If you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit, join our Club"). The idea was that you collected about twelve Club biscuit wrappers (any sort would do) and sent them in with, like, fifty pence or something to cover postage and you got the LP in return. Bargain. The TV advert that it tied in with featured a stereotypical Teddy Boy in the dock of a court singing 'Bar-bar-bah, bar-bar-bah-club' and all the jury doing the harmonies after the usher had shouted 'Prisoner at the bar...' A - reasonably flattering - bit of artwork of the actor involved is featured on the LP's cover holding a Club orange-backer whilst the - I'm presuming prosecuting - barrister has one of the previously mentioned dark chocolate variants in his grubby mitt.
On the back cover, the judge is looking faintly groovy in a Batman-style in his wig, clicking his fingers to the sensational soaraway summery sounds thereupon. But, he has no obvious Club biscuit to hand. More fool he, I say. Fine bunch of songs on the LP, as you'll note. Why don't biscuit companies do stuff like that these days to promote their nice biccies? I think that LP might well've been the first place I ever even HEARD The Honeycombs' epic 'Have I The Right?' It was certainly the first time that I'd owned songs like 'Waterloo Sunset', 'Albatross', 'An Everlasting Love' and 'Something in the Air' on a record. In fact, apart from the thoroughly crap Dr Hook dirge on side two I reckon I still have just about everything on that LP somewhere in my CD collection. Yes, even Tina Charles.
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